Welcome to Denny's. It will be our pleasure to serve you
tonight. Will that be smoking or non? Smoking? Excellent. Please follow
me. Would you like a booth or a table? Booth? OK, here's one right here,
just cleaned and ready for you. Your waitress will be right with you to
take your drink order.
Do you hear that often? If so, this page is not for you. This page
is for people who hear this:
Welcome... oh, it's you. Grab a booth, sit down and will be with
you whenever we can get to you.
This is a page dedicated to and produced by the newest breed of
slacker - the Dennyzen. Sure, people having been wasting their lives at
coffee shops, or some facsimile, since St. Juan Valdez discovered coffee
in the late 12th century, but few places afford the total slack-off experience
that only Denny's can provide. Consider this our shrine, nay, temple, if
you will to our home away from home, the place where everyone knows your
name but can never remember it - Denny's, the home of all happiness.
Dennyzen (n) - One who spends way too much
time at Denny's, drinking more than a dollar's worth of coffee, conducts
his or herself in manner unacceptable in the real world and leaves a sorry
excuse for a tip.
This page makes certain assumptions about you, the web surfer. One,
we assume that you have a life of equal or lesser value than ours, or you
would not be seeking out Denny's related web pages. Two, we actually believe
people find us funny and that you will as well. Three, we assume you are
reading this during the day, because if it were night, you would be at
Denny's. Four, we assume you probably know us personally and have only
come to this site to get us off your back about looking at it.
The pages contained beyond this are filled with God knows what.
We make no claim that it will live up to your expectations of humor, political
correctness or good taste. We can not be responsible for your apparent
lack of coolness, nor will we be. We would also like to ask anyone who
saw the first incarnation of this web page to please forget you ever saw
it. It sucked. Hard.
If you see a bit of yourself in the Dennyzen way of life, then
please enter. If you have come to our web site by mistake, well, sorry.
Blame the page that had a link here. Either way, thanks for reading this
far. You've read more of this page than we have. Please make your selection
from the buttons below.
This mediocre web site has been visited
times.
This site best viewed at whatever resolution you're not currently
on.
Windows users will have to restart to see it effectively.
This page is Copyright (c) 1998 ethereal propaganda productions.
Denny's logo, menus, etc... are used without explicit permission,
but we hope they don't mind.
